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Tuesday, August 23, 2005
Overdued end..
I am pissed off, world.. If i get anymore pissed, i might just turn green permanently and no amount of boxers, briefs or tighty whiteys can ever fit me. Looks like i'm about to lose a friendship. Now before all those ideas start evolving in your cerebrals, like Shaggy's song said, it was'nt me. At least i know it was'nt.. Was it?.. No. 1st of all, i have been the most patient friend ever to this person that i cut ties with. Anymore patient, and i will become a patient in a certain hospital somewhere, talking and laughing by myself with strait-jackets and all. Patience is a virtue, but too much will freakin hurt you. That so-called friendship was 11 years old. Pity huh? Some part of me would like to agree and another wanna kill off that other part for wanting to agree. So why all this anguish, bitter resentment at the poor old sap? Well for 1, he IS poor in kindness to other people that don't matter to him, he's slightly older than me but believes that he's 10 years younger(he's 27) and the arse of a man can really sap out the goodwill of those who could give a hoot about him. Shit, is this considered as gossiping? Ahhh, like i could spare a damn. Anyway, i'm pissed remember? So that should be ok, i think..
Years of friendship with the dude really takes the toll on my head. If i did'nt end that, then in a couple of years, this head will turn into an actual friggin foot-rest! So that grand final straw was when the dude used my extra handphone sim-card and could'nt eventually pay his share of the bill which has amounted to a lot. Still i tried to put up with this here because i knew of his then financial situation. Really had to struggle to simmer down when i thought about it. This was because i found out that secretly, he had been buying all sorts of stuff like an mp3 player, another handphone, ps2 games and more! All these while he claimed to be broke most of the time due to the house and utility bills, family and all his other could-be-avoided debts. Still when confronted with all these, he managed to find some 'virtuous' reasons as to justify them. Even had the slap-tempting cheeks to try and be mad at me for not understanding his situation. What friggin situation?! Oh, is it the tell me that he's broke 24-7, 365 but still manage to get himself leisure things like say, a ps2, mp3, new handphones every month and God knows what situation? Yeah. I understood. Even more when he drove that nail in further for saying that he thought i was his friend. So all those while, i was'nt being a friend for being there sacrificially looking gay'ish while he cried on my shoulders in freakin public after a bad break up, numerous amounts of yet to be settled loans, almost break my back while almost single-handedly helped him moved into a new house twice, helped painted his whole new house, watched his back from getting pummeled by his disgrunteled ex-colleagues and so on? If you insist then. Even mentioned to end the friendship a few times before during petty arguments.. If you should ever stumble upon this words my once good friend, know that even though it had turned out this way, my memories will not let all those happy moments fade. Still, the not-so's are the ones that started the cracks. Can't let you keep calling this a friendship when its actually an excuse to provide every ounce of convenience for your everyday life each and everytime. I may not be there for you always in the past and more so now, bro, but to me Izzy will always be my godson. Was there when he arrived to this tattered world, will be there for him til i leave it..
Overdued end..
I am pissed off, world.. If i get anymore pissed, i might just turn green permanently and no amount of boxers, briefs or tighty whiteys can ever fit me. Looks like i'm about to lose a friendship. Now before all those ideas start evolving in your cerebrals, like Shaggy's song said, it was'nt me. At least i know it was'nt.. Was it?.. No. 1st of all, i have been the most patient friend ever to this person that i cut ties with. Anymore patient, and i will become a patient in a certain hospital somewhere, talking and laughing by myself with strait-jackets and all. Patience is a virtue, but too much will freakin hurt you. That so-called friendship was 11 years old. Pity huh? Some part of me would like to agree and another wanna kill off that other part for wanting to agree. So why all this anguish, bitter resentment at the poor old sap? Well for 1, he IS poor in kindness to other people that don't matter to him, he's slightly older than me but believes that he's 10 years younger(he's 27) and the arse of a man can really sap out the goodwill of those who could give a hoot about him. Shit, is this considered as gossiping? Ahhh, like i could spare a damn. Anyway, i'm pissed remember? So that should be ok, i think..
Years of friendship with the dude really takes the toll on my head. If i did'nt end that, then in a couple of years, this head will turn into an actual friggin foot-rest! So that grand final straw was when the dude used my extra handphone sim-card and could'nt eventually pay his share of the bill which has amounted to a lot. Still i tried to put up with this here because i knew of his then financial situation. Really had to struggle to simmer down when i thought about it. This was because i found out that secretly, he had been buying all sorts of stuff like an mp3 player, another handphone, ps2 games and more! All these while he claimed to be broke most of the time due to the house and utility bills, family and all his other could-be-avoided debts. Still when confronted with all these, he managed to find some 'virtuous' reasons as to justify them. Even had the slap-tempting cheeks to try and be mad at me for not understanding his situation. What friggin situation?! Oh, is it the tell me that he's broke 24-7, 365 but still manage to get himself leisure things like say, a ps2, mp3, new handphones every month and God knows what situation? Yeah. I understood. Even more when he drove that nail in further for saying that he thought i was his friend. So all those while, i was'nt being a friend for being there sacrificially looking gay'ish while he cried on my shoulders in freakin public after a bad break up, numerous amounts of yet to be settled loans, almost break my back while almost single-handedly helped him moved into a new house twice, helped painted his whole new house, watched his back from getting pummeled by his disgrunteled ex-colleagues and so on? If you insist then. Even mentioned to end the friendship a few times before during petty arguments.. If you should ever stumble upon this words my once good friend, know that even though it had turned out this way, my memories will not let all those happy moments fade. Still, the not-so's are the ones that started the cracks. Can't let you keep calling this a friendship when its actually an excuse to provide every ounce of convenience for your everyday life each and everytime. I may not be there for you always in the past and more so now, bro, but to me Izzy will always be my godson. Was there when he arrived to this tattered world, will be there for him til i leave it..
4:10 PM |
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